Office work, time to shirk.

So bored.
I fucking hate the office.
TODAY I AM LEAVING :(
So buddies, you are probably wondering why I am writing a blog at 12 in the mid-day arena(?) but it's mostly cus I have ABSO-fucking-LUTELY nothing else to do.
Woke up this morning to my brothers dulcet tones screaming "wakeeee uppppp" (insert whingey pre-teen voice here, I know he is 15 but i am pretty sure he doesnt qualify as a teenager yet) "BAACCCOOOON FORRR BREAKFAST" (nasal intonation) "WHERE'S MY CAMERA CHARGERRRRR, YOU STOLE IT DIDN'T YOU? I'M TELLING MUMMYYYYYYY"
Yay! Morning's are always so pleasant in the house of Thomas/Parkinson.
So after pulling my considerable bulk out of bed I proceeded to galivant (TAKE NOTE, MWP!) to perform my various ablutions and have my (disgusting) breakfast. How can bacon be disgusting?! you all cry in horror. Well, let me ASSURE you, my maid Edna can turn even the most delightful things (candyfloss, sushi, mcdonald's fries) into a hulk of steaming manure. So after eating my - undercooked on one side and over cooked on the other intoned with the faint taste of rotting fish - bacon, I then proceeded to have a conversation with my mother.

OH HOW I LOVE CONVERSING WITH MY MOTHER. Nahhht. We spent about half an hour arguing about where to put the stuff we are packing for Italy. I suggested the suitcase after this prolonged "conversation" and I have been heralded as a child genius. God knows where the fuck I inherited THAT from.

So then I popped over to Bread and Breakfast to collect me a delightful lunch. Put off by my fecundant breakfast, I opted for a parma ham sandwich over a bacon and avocado one - you would too if you had to endure what I just did.

So now here I am, in the office, with nothing to do. I've already made two pass-the-parcels (inscripted with the words "DO YOU LIKE YOUR KNEECAPS? IF SO, DO NOT RELOCATE THESR PTPs)

ANYWAY, Dilemma is over soon and she will be bearing gifts of Frankensense (?), Myhrr (?) and gold (that one i CAN spell!) - or in other words pot noodles.

MUST GO PREPARE THE MANGER