Old habits die hard...

'Had a visit from an old friend about two months ago, and I can't seem to get rid of her. It's like when I am well again, she is lying, dormant - hibernating even - in my veins, waiting for my weakest moment. It just takes that one bad photo, that one snide comment - and I am off again. I know she's there, and I can't stop her. She's insatiable, and I know she (and I, for we seem one and the same nowadays) won't stop as long as I am wasting away, skin and bones. She's like a parasite, feeding off my insecurities and depressions. I've decided to come out with this now because I know others are suffering in the same way, and I do not want them to feel alone, it's just because of the negative influences around us that we get this freak phenomena. I know you probably feel like the only one in the world who is going through what you are going through now, but I am here too. Stay strong and we can beat this problem together.

I know, this is probably a little shocking, but most of you probably dont get it, but i told myself that I would blog about anything, no matter how embarrassing or controversial it is...

Anyway, had a huge fight with my mother this morning. I know this is probably really sick, but sometimes, if I have a particularly bad fight with her, I find myself wishing that she would die, so I could live with my dad and not have to deal with her. I know that's a horrible thought to have, but I really believe it sometimes - she drives me so fucking crazy.

Got to school on time - missed out on my morning smoke, and pretended to eat breakfast - which was a miracle. Had a free first lesson which I slept SOLIDLY through - probably because I was up so fucking late, thanks to a certain someone. Then I had English with Mr. Wheeler, who has just had an adorable baby girl called Anna. Christy was terrified about the upcoming Senior Prefect interviews, so we spent most of the lesson giving her tips and calming her down.

Talking of Head Boys and Girls, CONGRATULATIONS JHO and PILAU!

Had Philo next, and MY GOD I hate Miss Foley. So this terribly bigotted and hypocritical guy in my class was going on and on how he would hate his own son if he was fat and gay (something later pointed out to me, was that the guy in question was suspected to be gay himself) and instead of reprimanding him for his close minded and selfish ways, MISS FOLEY LAUGHED

Yes, I am fucking serious, she laughed. I feel completely and utterly sickened. What this school needs is some morals from it's teachers. They need to set an example for the rest of the students. Can you imagine, if we had someone gay in our class, and all the class was laughing about Dev's hypothetical gay son? I felt like choking both him and her. They have no idea how stupid they sound to the majority of the educated people around the world.

Maths last, and to our delight the fire alarm went off, so we didnt get much done (we never really get much done, but hey!) but I did get a sticker for finishing my work. I think Miss Chiu thinks I am severely retarded because I get stickers just for bringing the right book to class.

Ha, Maths Studies, what a joke.